Does the No Contact method really work?

Every day someone writes me talking about how they feel taken for granted. They talk about how their significant other treats them like a doormat. They feel tired and worn down because the person they love keeps walking in and out of their life. Of the few tactics employable to get a guy to straighten out, the no contact method seems to be the most popular and effective. So let’s talk about it. Does it really work? And do guys give a crap?

The no contact rule does work if the guy actually gave a crap to begin with. Too many girls try the no contact method unwilling to accept the results or actually distance themselves. Other women never really insist on being treated better and take a guy back who hasn’t changed at all.

There are two main ideas of the no contact method. The first of which is to detoxify yourself from the relationship and life that you’ve built around it. It’s like finding yourself again. Separating yourself from your ex entirely, in hopes of developing a new routine and higher self-esteem. Don’t contact them and don’t respond to them trying to get in touch with you. Learn how to live a single life with no dependency on a partner. During this time, it’s recommended that you stay busy and live life to the fullest to really start the healing process. It may feel like a drug withdrawal, but it’s absolutely necessary.

The other main idea is to make your ex realize what they lost.  And start to miss you so badly that they become emotionally unstable and beg you to take them back. It’s like putting your ex in time out. Lol. You reject them and what they have to offer until they make the changes in behavior that you want. The fear that they have lost you entirely is expected to make an ex-straighten up. People do this by cutting off all contact temporarily, in the hopes that it makes the person change and build up to a suspenseful and emotional reunion. It’s important to articulate your issues with them before cutting contact, so they can genuinely consider if they really want to make those improvements. Many of you have read my blog about what to do when a guy gets ghost. Read it here → You know how at the end I said: “Fuck em.” We’ll the no contact method is like “Fuck em” light.

With that said, yes in many cases it works. Hell, I’ve done it by accident, and it worked. At the time I didn’t realize that’s what I was doing. I wasn’t trying to manipulate their feelings. I just don’t do the whole on again off again thing. If you want to try it just remember, if you never addressed the reason for the breakup then the reunion will be short-lived. If you haven’t, go read the should I take an ex back blog. In that blog, I detail things you must consider before getting back with an old flame.

If you are going to try the no contact method, do so with a real intent to move on, but an openness to reconcile. If your only plan is to get them back, it probably won’t work for you. This is because you won’t be able to fake being disengaged long enough to really scare them. If you choose to do so, pick a goal and a timeline and stick to it. Don’t contact them and don’t respond if they reach out to you until that period has passed or the behavior has been corrected. If they never change or offer to change move on, seriously.

Girls often try this on men who never cared for them. Accept the results, if he turns out to be happier without you in his life at all. You win some; you lose some. Don’t play yourself by calling him and cursing him out. Don’t try to bump into him in public and make him jealous. Just move on because; fuck em.

This method is the best way to get past a break up as well. Get closure if you must and make a clean break.


Kev Hick

2 thoughts on “Does the No Contact method really work?

  • January 14, 2018 at 2:05 am

    No contact rule worked for me. I was seeing a guy for a while so when I suggested we make it official he started going on like he didn’t understand where I was coming from. it was like him talking to me everyday for most the day, him coming over to spend the whole day with me, us chilling having fun ( non sexual) flirting and getting to know each other more was all in my head. So since the relationship was not going any where fast I told him we could go on and lose my number and I would do the same plus delete from social media and even his email and blackberry so we going a few years back. Even when I saw him whilst I was driving and we were side by side in traffic we would just stare each other out foolish I know. Roll on 2018 we saw each other and he walked round to meet me we talked but never exchange contact details and he still remains blocked by me

  • January 14, 2018 at 2:22 am

    The non contract method can only truelly work if you believe you deserve better than what a partner is is giving. Don’t text see how their doing after a couple of weeks, get rid of the pics, delete the call history and when you see their friends keep it brief. ..”Your looking well hope you and your family are fine…..Take care ” You have to be militant with yourself because an ex knows what to say, do and how to act to draw you back it.


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